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Little things mean a lot


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#1 KindredSpirit

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Posted 07 September 2004 - 03:02 PM

Thought it might be fun to start a thread containing ideas on little things one can do to put the spark back into a marriage/relationship (for example:a candlelight dinner, writing love notes, etc.). Let's hear your ideas!

#2 JennyLou

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Posted 07 September 2004 - 04:46 PM

Hubby and I have only been married four years, so not a ton of experience to draw on. But, I did want to share one fun thing I've done.

I bought some stickers at a stationary store. I bought two packs, one with kissy lips and another one with hearts. Everyonce in a while, I'll place a sticker on something of the hubby's. Naturally, a good spot was the remote control to the t.v. :lol: When he first found them, he asked what was up and I said it was just a tiny reminder that I loved him.

It's been a fun game "hiding" them and waiting for him to find them. It didn't cost much and it's a simple way to keep our love for each other in focus.

Jenny

#3 zuziqu

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Posted 07 September 2004 - 06:38 PM

When Ed and I are in the same car, we always kiss each other before driving off - sometimes one of us even pulls up the emergency brake because the other forgot!

I asked Ed if he would always kiss me goodbye in the morning before he leaves for work. It is special.

Love, Sue


#4 Fallen_Wings

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Posted 07 September 2004 - 07:07 PM

My DH works away for 4 days out of 8 and we call each other every night. Even if it's only a quick 5 minute call. We always make sure we end the call by saying I Love You. i also text him sometimes with little love messages. I never get any back cos he is a total text virgin, and it would take him a day just to write it!!!!!!

I still love him to bits even if he can't text.

Love and hugs
Kaz

#5 KindredSpirit

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Posted 07 September 2004 - 10:22 PM

Between marriages I lived with a man that always did romantic things. One thing I'll never forget:

One evening I came home from work and there was a note on the table that read: "Retreat to the bathroom" or something like that and when I went into the bathroom there was a CD player with a new CD that I had been wanting in it, candles, new bubble bath, soaps, etc. and a note that read something like: "take your time, enjoy your bath then go into the bedroom". After the bath I went into the bedroom and there was a pretty silky long night gown in there with a note on it that read "slip into something comfortable and go into the dining room. When I got to the dining room he had the table set real nice, all of the lights off, soft candlelight and had ordered take out from my FAVORITE sushi place.

It was sooo cool, one of the most romantic things that anyone had ever done for me.

#6 Kaktus

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Posted 08 September 2004 - 11:19 PM

::edited for stupidity::

#7 KindredSpirit

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Posted 09 September 2004 - 01:57 AM

LMFAO Friend!

#8 romanoff

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Posted 09 September 2004 - 03:33 AM

Yeah, sadly, it takes two to tango. My relationship with stbx was a bit of a gender bender - I am way too sentimental and romantic for a guy, and she is anything but. Also she insists that nothing is worthwhile that isn't totally spontaneous - I don't think this is realistic once you are over 25 or so.

At the end of the day, I think that you both need to believe that a relationship needs, and is worth, care and work.

As far as exactly what - the more tailored to your SO's personality you make it, the better. Also frequency counts, not just saving it all up for something extravagant on birthdays, anniversaries or holidays.

Well, that's one man's viewpoint, anyway.

#9 Hangingon

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Posted 11 September 2004 - 03:50 AM

:hm:

- Send romantic and/or erotic poetry
- Send or point out songs that touch you and remind you of what you share
- Compliment often the things you adore about your SO

Love

Sheila

#10 romanoff

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Posted 11 September 2004 - 03:58 AM

Sounds good to me, Sheila. I can't speak for the women, but I think that many men will respond to and even reciprocate these things, given enough repetition and reinforcement :D

btw I forgot to say before - romance is supposed to be FUN!

#11 Hangingon

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Posted 11 September 2004 - 03:59 AM

Jenny!

I absolutely love that idea. The most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me is my current GF. For valentines day, she made me a red paper heart for each day we had been seeing each other. On each heart, she had a word that reminded her of us and our relationship. :D Never had anyone make any kind of an effort for me before and it meant more to me than any gift she could have bought me.

Another thing she did for me that was very sweet was when I went to NYC for the BTB meet, she wrote me a letter to take with me and read for each day I was gone. Very touching and meaningful as well.

Love

Sheila

#12 this is me

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Posted 13 September 2004 - 12:59 AM

DH use to come home from work on Fridays with wine and French bread and flowers. . . that was before his depression kicked in :sigh:

Now I IM him when he is in the other room . . . odd but it works for us :?

#13 Robyn

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Posted 14 September 2004 - 05:22 PM

My bf plays in a band (engineer by day/band guy by night) and sometimes he will play the piano and sing to me. He makes me sit right next to him and he kisses me on the top of the head between verses. I am sure the people in the bar are rolling their eyes at us, but he doesn't seem to care. :oops:

#14 Judithemu

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Posted 22 September 2004 - 07:21 PM

I'm always sending my husband a quick text message or e-mail- "I love you" or "thinking of you" or "can't wait to see you tonight".

#15 Jellycat

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Posted 23 September 2004 - 08:32 AM

I went and got two cats!

Me and dh are still struggling a bit to get back to where we were before my depression, but its getting better, get a kiss now before he goes to work and when he gets home, got a cuddle the other day. :shock: I find the kitties bring us together more, they are sort of go-betweens. We sort of have a lot of group hugs............

I bought a painting for our anniversary and he bought me a big bunch of roses, progress...

I think the best was going hiking, making it up the the highest peak on a difficult trail and looking down at the view together

Im not sure theres any sparks yet!

Jellyxxxxxxxxxx

#16 k2.

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Posted 23 September 2004 - 10:18 AM

Gosh, I wouldn't know what romantic is. My hubby''s idea of romantic is popping "it" out and saying "mmmMMMmm"   :P


yeah thats been the extent of my experience too... that or fancy a quickie... never failed to make my heart do somersaults.

My ex used to make me fairy cakes in secret and surprise me with them. I always thought that was really sweet.

then he'd whip "it" out and ask for a quicky.

#17 OzMike

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Posted 21 January 2005 - 12:08 PM

Ooo, my second post, and it's getting romantic already! :D

This one can take a bit of organising, but it's worth it. Via another online forum I organised for many people in many countries to send postcards to my g/f at her shared house with 'Happy Anniversary' written on them. Yes, it was necessary to be careful about who got her address, and - yes - it was necessary to provide an incentive for people to send them .... however, when first one, then two, then five postcards were arriving each day or so, all with wonderful images from many different countries, it was worthwhile. My g/f, after she found out what was going on, would really look forward to getting home and seeing what postcards she was receiving that day, and from where. She ended up receiving about 80 postcards, and has a nice collection of well-wishes from strangers for our anniversary. :)

Mike

#18 Mom27

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Posted 21 January 2005 - 12:32 PM

Hey. My DH and I have been married for five years, and I think the most romantic things we've done are:
cards for no reason
I buy HIM flowers
He wrote out to me the lyrics of "The Impossible Dream" and a poem on why I'm his dream
And I found out he kept the first love letter I ever wrote him in his wallet (sadly I washed it and it was destroyed)

Oh yeah, and my sad but funny/romantic story-
One week after our marriage, I was at work, and I kid you not, my wedding ring which was a little loose, slipped off just after I flushed the toilet and went down. I was mortified and shocked. I called him in tears, and he had me laughing in a few minutes. After work, he picked me up, and handed me a little teddy bear. He said it was a Russian bear named Barishnikov, who had been hitchhiking, and no one wanted to pick him up because no one likes Russian bears. DH took pity on him, and picked him up, and for his kindness, the bear had a gift for us. The bear had a backpack on, and in the backpack was a new wedding ring.

I still love that story. How romantic-though he'd hate it he knew I told everyone, because he likes to keep that macho facade. :)

#19 Heather

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Posted 11 June 2005 - 08:38 PM

My hubby is amazing with words. He quite often will write poetry to me. I have kept every one of his poems from the past 24 years. I leave love notes all over for him; in his tool box, in his lunch, jacket pockets, on the shave cream bottle, in the inside of his shoes, where ever.
My nephew takes his gf's on many exciting dates. One was a dumpster date. Seriously! He worked at a small grocery store so went out back, cleaned up the cardboard dumpster, put a table in there complete with table cloth, plates, cutlery, candles, napkins, then had the cashiers bring out the vegetarian pizza. He also took his gf for a walk in a park. Low and behold, there was a table and 2 chairs in the middle of the park (it was dusk). "I think we should sit down", he said to her. They no sooner sat down when a few of his buddies, dressed in suits, came out of the bushes. One had the plates, cutlery, wine glasses etc... another had a bottle of wine, another had the salad and another had the main course. The buddies served the dinner, then left, returning an hour later to do the clean up. Another time (late fall), he picked up his gf in the grocery store's 5 ton panel van. He drove down in the pouring rain to a campsite right on the beach. He pulled out dry firewood from under the seat, got a rip roaring fire going, then opened the back door of the van. He had a couch, table and a cooler in the back. They sat through the evening, snuggling in comfort and out of the rain, sipping wine, watching the fire and listening to the waves roll in. The last date I heard about was on campus. There wasn't a resturaunt around, but he had told his gf they were going for dinner. Neither had a car, so she was a little confused. As they walked past the staduim on campus, he said they should sneak in and see what was going on. As they entered the field, all of the overhead lights came on. In the centre of the field was again, a table and 2 chairs, a cooler and a barbeque. He sat his girlfriend down at the table, prepared steaks on the BBQ, pulled salads out of the cooler, then poured wine. After dinner, he pulled out strawberries and chocolate dip and they headed way up to the nose bleed section of the stadium. From there, they relaxed, ate strawberries, drank a little more wine and enjoyed the rest of the evening. How the last date happened, he had spoken on several different occasions with the grounds keeper and security, becoming quite friendly with all of them. He told them that he was wanting a "very special, romantic evening with his gf wink, wink, on such and such a date". He said they assumed that he was "popping the big question" ( you really have to know my nephew. He is the coolest guy!) and were only happy to help in anyway they could. It was her birthday, but he wasn't going to tell them that!
He's now living in Austrailia, happily engaged. No, not to any of the women previously mentioned either! He's one of a kind! Anyone for a dumpster date?

Heather.

#20 verysadcat

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Posted 11 June 2005 - 10:11 PM

sounds like your nephew likes to eat, heather! :lol:

I think the most romantic guy that did anything for me was an old bf of mine.

it was xmas time and I am just a big scrooge. don't want decorations. don't want to send out cards. just want the damn holiday to be over so people get back to being themselves.

a few days before xmas I had to work and he didn't so he drove me in and borrowed my car. I worked a 12 hour shift and when he came to pick me up he was grinning like an idiot so I knew something was up.

when we got home he insisted that I go in the door first. well, I opened the door and just stood there with my mouth hanging open! he had gone and gotten a tree, decorated the whole thing and decorated the house! it was beautiful and so sweet that he had gone to all of that trouble just to get me out of my grumpy mood.

he had enlisted my brother to haul the tree so everyone in my family knew about it and thought he was just the most wonderful guy in the world.

turns out he wasn't, but that's another story.
Di