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some sort of schizophriania I think

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#1 awesomesauce

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Posted 11 February 2014 - 10:23 PM

Hi. I haven't been on here for a long time. Anyways, so i have major deppresson and I was on an anti-depressant and i was symptom free for months.

And now I have some new symtioms. When I was younger I used to feel bugs crawling on me all of the time and I havn't felt them for years and now i feel them agin. When i was in high school somtimes I would see animals in my mind at random. When i was deppressed I would see and hear scay things. And all of that went away. Soooo, now I sometimes would see animals/numbers/one evil Cat 1 millon in my mind. On the outside of my mind I would see random things at times like ants on the walls and once saw blood on my foot other things. I have imaganery frinds/enimeys that are animals/numbers/people that are voices/visual hullcinations. And I talk with them and stuff. And they are real to me and I have diffuclty telling what is real and what is not when i hullcinate on the outside of my mind etc. And I have had a lot of parinoid delusions about irrlogical things. When I do I have no clue about the real world.

Sooo, im scard and I belive that I have some kind of schizophrina.

Can anyone relate. And I'm female and 20 by the way. There is no history of mental illness within my family.

im haveing a difficult time. Everyday is new and unperdicable.

#2 fiona

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Posted 15 February 2014 - 02:50 AM

Awesomesauce -


I've emailed and posted responses to you before.  Glad you are back.  We all go through periods of feeling just fine, then sinking into who knows what.  I'm in the sinking part right now, just like you are in your own scary moments.  


Don't really know where it's going to be each day….progressing or falling back.  Just know that it's important to still try to reach out…which you are doing….so good for you.


Whatever type of mental illness I think there is an important part to get over about the stigma and about having it ( you mentioned that this was not something in your family history),  Once you get a grip that it's just a part of your life to deal with like any other person with some sort of handicap, it's possible to make great strides.  Life is going to be what you make of it, so write yourself a happy ending (I remember that you like to write).  If you're lacking a role model…I know they are out there, go find them….and if you're lacking the motivation or just feeling like you need to vent to those of us who are in the same boat….please continue to post.