So, as soon as I got on campus for fall semester, I put in as many applications as I could find (even though it took me a good long time to turn in the actual apps). Now, I've received two interview appointment calls. One interview is for a telemarketing agency on campus, and is a phone interview for tonight, which leaves me terrified. I've always had a certain phone phobia, if you will, if I do not know who I'm calling/ who is calling me. Now, the salary of this job leaves me quite willing to try to get over this fear, but still leaves me prey to the other various fears lurking about my brain. I'm so nervous, so very nervous, about fucking up on the job (if I even get it) and about being inept when it comes to speaking to people, which has happened before. I want to save up enough to purchase a used car, and start shopping around for apartments. I just don't want to be the burden I know I'm becoming to my family. My brother has had 2 jobs, and my parents couldn't be more proud of him. I can hear the lies behind my parent's falsified claims of pride and unburdened attitude towards my current college existance. Mum was so excited when I was telling her of possible job opportunities. SO happy. And telling her my rejection from said jobs brought me down so much with her tone of disappointment. So I suppose the point to my frantic rambling right now is that I'm scared, and I just want to do well enough for my parents to be happy with me.
Hopefully ready to work!